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A well-known maxim recommends longer courtships followed by shorter engagements. Brown concurs: “Infatuation may be romantic, glamorous, thrilling, and even urgent, but genuine love should not be in a hurry. Time should be taken for serious thought, and opportunity given for [each partner to gain] physical, mental, and spiritual maturity.Longer acquaintances will enable both to evaluate themselves and their proposed companions, to know each other’s likes and dislikes, habits and dispositions, aptitudes and aspirations” ( Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1960, pp. Building a strong premarital friendship requires spending sufficient time with each other and finding opportunities for interaction.I know of couples who spent almost their entire engagement separated because of work or school.Similarly, some couples count a partner’s years on a mission as courtship time.We found it truly exciting just to be in each other’s company.Sometimes either one partner or both partners in a dating relationship begin to feel urgency to rush toward marriage before they know anything about each other.When I first dated my wife, Judy, I was preparing to leave for college within a month.I did leave, but I felt that our budding relationship was too promising to abandon—so I returned home to enroll in a local school and continue our courtship.
After one of his first dates with his future wife, David O. At the very top is what he terms a “glittering little mystery called romance.” If one tries to stand the pyramid on its point, expecting romance to hold everything else up, the pyramid will fall (“The Gospel and Romantic Love,” We should be prayerful in all that we do, but courtship is a particularly important time to receive the Lord’s inspiration.
Although time apart can provide valuable perspective, long-distance romances can’t replace face-to-face interaction even if a couple spends a fortune on postage.
Relationships and individuals change too quickly and too subtly to be monitored and influenced from afar.
We must not be in a hurry, acting on impulse and emotion alone.
Best friends who marry are likely to find joy and fulfillment together through all seasons of life. ” His sweetheart added: “Yes, and we held hands all the way home” (David Laurence Mc Kay, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1989, p. There is another challenge common to courtships: curbing the desire for premature romantic involvement is an important part of building a strong friendship during dating.
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How did the Bensons develop their strong relationship? President Benson’s biographer tells us that during this time, they “talked for hours, exploring their feelings about a future together. The more they talked, the more comfortable they felt with each other.” The prophet himself describes it this way: “‘There was so much to tell and we seemed to enjoy each other so very much. It was a perfect courtship during which I discovered in Flora a great character and a rare combination of virtues’” (Sheri L. On the other hand, Scott and Pamela met a few months after Scott returned from his mission. After a whirlwind courtship, they married in a beautiful temple ceremony.